Brian Williams Reports That Over One Quarter of Americans Have Been Killed By Covid-19

(New York, New York) – In news that is certain to send markets reeling and extend state lock downs indefinitely, former NBC network news anchor and amateur mathematician Brian Williams…

Government Announces Ambitious Plan To Kill Murder Hornets With Covid-19

(Washington, D.C. -) Amid reports of a second mortal threat emerging out of Asia, the federal government has announced their intention to pit the Chinese Coronavirus against the Japanese Murder…

2026 FIFA World Cup Canceled “Out of an Abundance of Caution”

(Zürich, Switzerland) – The Fédération Internationale de Football Association has canceled the 2026 World Cup, which was scheduled to be played in North America six years from now, The Fake…

McMahon Announces It Will Be Mandatory For XFL Champs to Visit White House, Get Body-slammed By President

(STAMFORD, CT) – Vince McMahon, famed WWE founder and chairman of the newly revived XFL football league, has announced that the inaugural XFL champions will be going to the White House…