(Newark, NJ) – Doubling down on its recent commitment to hire at least 50% female and minority pilots, United Airlines wants it to be known that they’re not stopping there.
“For far too long these baggage handling jobs have been dominated by males, just because they have the upper body strength to do it efficiently and without hurting themselves,” United spokesperson Christie Roberson told The Fake Scoop.
Early indications are that many more woman are excited to begin working long, strenuous hours in the elements for low pay.
“We didn’t even know this occupation existed,” lawyer and feminist icon Gloria Allred told reporters via conference call. “The patriarchy has been hiding it from us.”
Allred is set to start work at LAX 6:30 Monday morning. “I’ll be there with bells on,” the 79-year-old proclaimed.