“Don’t Forget to SuperSize Me Today,” Biden Tells Crowd of Democratic Primary Voters

(Austin, Texas) – Hot off the heels of his victory in the South Carolina Democrat primary, former Vice President Joe Biden offered an unusual plea to voters on the day of the all-important ‘Super Tuesday’ contests.

“Don’t forget to SuperSize me today,” Biden told the crowd. “It’s only $0.39 cents more.”

Some Confusion

Political analysts say that Biden is likely referring to the McDonald’s promotion which ended well over a decade ago, following the release of a critical documentary of the same name.

“Shut up you lying dog-faced pony soldiers,” Biden told reporters when asked for clarification.

Bloomberg Upset

Former New York City mayor Michael Bloomberg’s campaign released a terse statement that called Biden’s remarks irresponsible.

“As the founder of Mayors Against Illegal Sodas I’ve been on the forefront of the fight against large sugary beverages,” Bloomberg was quoted as saying. “My mother told me the caffeine would stunt my growth, and she was right.”