Elon Musk Threatens to Move Tesla to Mars

(Palo Alto, California -) Denied permission to open his electric car factory back up following a state-imposed Coronavirus-related closure, an irate Elon Musk threatened Tuesday to move Tesla, Inc. out of California.

While some in the press have speculated that Musk planned to move his company’s operations to Texas or Nevada, the 48-year-old billionaire made waves when he announced Earth’s neighbor Mars as Tesla’s new home.

“This is so Musk,” fellow rich celebrity Mark Cuban wrote on Twitter. “First he smokes pot on Joe Rogan, and now this.”

Believe the Hype

Some have questioned the practicality of getting the factory and its workers the more than 100 million miles to the Red Planet within the foreseeable future.

“If anyone can do it, Elon can,” Tesla engineer Jeffrey Maynard told The Fake Scoop.¬†“This is the man who invented the hyperloop.”

“Well, drew pictures of it anyway,” Maynard conceded.

Financially Viable

Fortunately for Musk there is no shortage of money available for what is sure to be an expensive move.

Sources tell TFS that Tesla has already applied and been approved for unlimited relocation funds courtesy of the Martian government.

“QaStaHvIS DIS law’ je’ Human elon Musk ilk ‘ej ‘arghbej chetlhej wIneH,” a Martian spokesman explained.